Coronavirus19 Diary - Despair, A Moment of Joy and Hope

 Finally on election night I forced myself to bed, depressed, watching Trump lead in several states needed for Biden to win an electoral college majority. My mind refused to rest. Over and over in my head I considered how I, and the country, would survive another 4 years of leadership by a man who was just short of, if not fully deranged. I would wake up and turn on the t.v. to see the latest counts. At 4 a.m. I saw that Wisconsin had been called for Biden and hope began to return.

The next day I felt as if I was jet lagged despite my feet never having left the ground. Over the next few days I watched as Trump's lead in key states began to shrink, disappear and eventually be surpassed by Biden. 

Saturday morning I stepped off the bus on Michigan Ave. enroute to work and encountered a group of people jumping up and down on the sidewalk holding their phones aloft. Horns began to honk. Two young guys came down a side street yelling. I pulled out my phone to see a text message from my husband, two words, "Biden wins". I let out a yell. It was a wild, unintelligible noise. A bubble of anxiety bursting and manifesting itself in a sound which was a mixture of relief and joy.

As I left work later that evening Michigan Ave. was packed with cars, their horns honking, flags flying from their windows. Networks showed people across the country and the world dancing in the streets. It was a moment of near unanimous global euphoria. 

But, as happens after many joyous celebrations, afterward we find our challenges remain. The pandemic worsens and administration officials refuse to acknowledge Biden's victory and assist with a transition, even with Biden receiving a clear majority of both the popular and electoral college votes. There is the question of control of the Senate. Poverty and mass unemployment still run rampant. 

But I still hold hope that we will come through this dark time a stronger union. There will always be extremists on both sides of issues but I have hope that a national leader that promises to bring us together, not attempt daily to drive us apart, will be the beginning a country that I dream of. Even if it is the first small step in a long road, a country where we begin to care and support fellow citizens of both the country and the world.

I have hope.