Sunday, March 16, 2014

Degrees of Seperation - Part Three of Three - Roddy McDowell and Assorted Royals

The final story that evening involved our roommates boyfriend. He had, at one time, a roommate whose exquisite beauty was only matched, so the tale went, by his extreme vapidity and supreme stupidity. They described him as "pretty dumb", just dumb enough to use his pretty. They swore on the bible that whenever the conversation in the room rose to a level above his lovely head he would start singing "Jingle Bells" no matter what the season and attempt to get all others in the room to join in.

This beguiling creature had been for a period of time the boy toy of the famous actor Roddy McDowell. Around Hollywood this position was known to not contain a high level of job security. Mr. McDowell was apparently quite fickle and easily bored.

Working in an L.A. area wine shop the pretty one was sent one evening to deliver a bottle of wine to Mr. McDowell at a hotel. Upon arriving the man at the desk told him Mr. McDowell was out, he would take the wine and see that it got to him. The lovely one declared "I'll wait" and took a seat in the lobby. When Mr. McDowell returned he walked up to him, wine in hand saying "Here's your wine Mr. McDowell."

Sometime later the young man and the actor were in London preparing to go out to dinner. Apparently the position of Mr. McDowell's boy Du jour, while being a short lived career, did have it's advantages. The actor told him that there was a surprise in store for him at dinner. When they arrived at the restaurant they were joined by...Princess Margaret...dashing through the snow, in a one horse open sleigh.....

After dinner the princess remarked that there were to be fireworks that evening in celebration of the queen's silver jubilee and she knew of a room in the palace where they would be able to get a great view of them....over the fields we go, laughing all the way......

A motorcade appeared out of nowhere and whisked them to Buckingham Palace. They discovered, upon arriving at the legendary royal residence, sitting in the room preparing to view the fireworks with them, 2 ladies in waiting and her Royal Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second.....JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAY!!!!!!!!!!

After the fireworks the Queen turned to the young lad and inquired "Is this your first time at the palace?". She then proceeded to take him on a personal tour pointing out the masterworks of art and priceless pieces of English history housed in the venerable building.

Alas, Roddy soon tired of him and turned him out as he had soon many others before him. The lad found himself sharing an apartment in a seedy area of L.A. with our roommates boyfriend, still attempting to get all in the room to sing a chorus of Jingle Bells, no matter what the season, when the conversation began to rise above his pretty head.